I read a post this morning from another #autismmom and it inspired me to think differently about what to do when we fail. She described how her daughter with autism had recieved her first 'C'. As her daughter usually gets A's & B's, her daughter was very upset. So this Mom did something unexpected and amazing. She took her daughter out for an afternoon of her favorite things. They went shopping at her favorite store, ordered food from her favorite restaurant and celebrated her first 'C'.
I love this for several reasons. First, a lot of individuals with autism have rigid behaviors based around their expectations of how things are supposed to go. And let's be honest, we all have this tendency a little bit. When things go the way we expect them to, it's a great day! When unexpected things happen, our day de-rails, we get flustered and spend the day picking up the pieces.
Second, why do we align our lives so much with achievements and success? Life isn't measured in our successes, life has always been about the ups and downs. At the end of the day haven't we learned more about ourselves when faced with unexpected circumstances? For instance, we can observe our reactions when things don't go as planned. For me, I get quiet and my stomach starts to hurt and I clean the house. I stop trying to communicate and I shift inward. That shift allows me to evaluate the situation and figure out how to solve it or what to do different next time. And this should be celebrated!
Lastly, why aren't we celebrating more of our failures of disruptions? What if we did? Would it teach our children that life is going to be a series of successes and failures and that both are valid and important. Successes can absolutely be enjoyed and celebrated, but so to can our failures. All because your value as a human doesn't depend on your grades or how much money you make or the car you drive. Your value comes from how you show up each and every day and how much LOVE you contribute not only to your inner self, but to the world around you as well.
Thank you to this incredible Mom for reminding all of us to not take it all so seriously and to always find a reason to celebrate being human. And let's remember that to try means more than anything. So let's celebrate! What failures have you had lately? What new things have you attempted?
Comments